what im based around.

Its been months.

one month since the ipod was announced available on verizon.
one and a half since i have written last
two since
three since i have kissed a boy
four since my nephew was born
five since i believed in love.
six months since i started my job again.
seven months since i last understood what was in my future.
eight months since i last..

felt..

alive.


not in a morbid i wanna die way, or a lack of communication with God.. but more along the lines of I havet had a passion for art. I did not want to do it. i was frustrated and annoyed about my money situation. because of that i chose the not allow myself to do art. i stopped, and started producing crap pieces. stuff i am not proud to admit was mine. and now. i dont know how to get back. I know that God gave me a gift, and that gift is the ability to do art. and when i produce art i feel my passion for God and my love of God continue to grow. but now im stuck. and im producing stuff i still hate.
please tell me... where am i supposed to start again. i feel... alone. the people i need to talk to about work, and art... well they are not around.

i love having Jesus in my life... but He made me to create art... and when i am not doing that. i feel like part of me is not being expressed. like i am trying to scream, but someone has a pillow on my head.

anyways. heres the lastest piece of trash.



i want this blog to help me make sense of life. its not gonna happen..


enjoy.


hillary elizabeth.